Admittedly, most gay men don't get to go to too many weddings. As they get older, their circles tend to become more 'ghetto inclined', and while relationships with heterosexual friends do continue, they tend to find friendships with more 'like minded' individuals. I believe the reason for this might have something to do with the fact that gay men actually prefer to talk about things other than 'being gay', but I tend to find with many of my straight friends, the conversation inevitably steers towards that. Gay men might talk about 'gay' things, such as pop music, cute boys, and fantastic chick flicks, but they don't sit around trying to justify their sexual persuasion on each other. They talk about 'life', or at least 'gay life', as opposed to why they turned out gay, or how they know they're gay, or blah-blah-blah-i've-been-over-this-a-hundred-times-before...
But anyway, Ant and I are off to a wedding today. It's for Rein and Jacqueline, who have been going out together on and off for years now. I've known Rein for the majority of my lfe, having met him in preps. Although I don't remember it, Rein tells me that we became friends when I offered him one of my Star Wars figurines. Also, a kid with a name like Rein was just asking for it during the 70's. He heard so many 'Rein Rein, go away, come again another day' chants that it wasn't funny, but as we all know, kids can be cruel. Over the past decade, we probably haven't been in touch as much as we could, but I guess that is life also. I caught up with Rein and another old highschool friend Matt perhaps two or three years ago... now, that was an experience as Matt hadn't seemed to change much at all, except for looking older. He had the same humour... same ambitions... it was like a time warp back a decade, and frankly, it was scary. A man who thought he was going to achieve the same things but a decade later. If ever Old Man Time was dancing in front of you naked and chanting, "Let me go and get a new dream!", it was here...
I've also got another wedding in about three weeks for Spencer and Slava. I work with Spencer, and I secretly think Michael and I were hoping we wouldn't be invited... not because we don't like Spencer or anything like that... it's just weddings can always get very costly. As I suspected recently, all my mechanical worldly possessions seem to be 'on the way out'. My DVD burner died last week, and so i've taken that in for repair. The car stereo speakers seem to hate the heat and cut out as soon as it gets hot, and then the CD skips in it too. The car feels sluggish, and I know next time I take that back in for service, the engine chain may need to be replaced, and that's going to be costly. And the computer still continues to play up, not to mention the fact that my bedroom stereo hasn't been working properly for years! Sometimes, I do wonder.
I did catch up with Miles recently, which was a great experience...14 years or so after we last were in touch. It's a very different dynamic to our friendship now, but that is to be expected, but I hope that we do continue to stay in touch as I do have a lot of time for him.
Anyway, I best start to get ready. I'm still feeling terribly out of shape and need to get across that, but for the time being, I need to put that aside and make myself look as fantastic as possible!
Well, this is a rarity! At home, on a Saturday night. Ant and I sat down and watched 'Shrek 2' before, and he is now watching tv while I do some cleaning up and wotnot...
Lately, it seems like all electrical items hate me. My bedroom stereo and car stereo have been playing up for a while, but with work being so close (thus eliminating too much time in the car), and with my computer being a virtual stereo, it hasn't been high on the priority list. But now, my computer seems to be playing up, and one of my more higher priced DVD appliances is making a strangely loud humming noise too. I'm close to reaching a 'total shrug of indifference' towards all this but it does piss me off a little. I can be such a materialistic creature sometimes. So, if anyone knows what could make the mouse temporarily freeze and occasionally even make the motherboard give a short beep, please let me know. I thought it was the motherboard on the way out, but I suspect it could be software related now... which is worse, cause it would probably just be easier to start my system from scratch instead of trying to figure it all out!
I guess the 'big news' for me recently involves a bit of 'closure' on years of wondering what happened to an old friend. When I was a kid, I befriended Miles Buchanan, who was a child actor, having won a Logie at a very early age and was seemingly in constant demand for various productions. We kept in touch for many years until over night, he just seemingly disappeared. For years, I wondered what happened to him, and every couple of years, even tried some attempts to find him, but to no luck.
Then last Saturday night, I was over at my friend Michael's place. We were talking about recent books that we had read, and he asked me if I remembered an actor from years back named Miles Buchanan.
"You're joking, right?", I asked, thinking he knew the Miles and I connection.
"No. Why?", he said, looking at me rather stunned.
And so I explained to him the whole background and everything.
"Oh, well, his mum has just written a book called 'Wings Of Madness' which deals with the Buchanan family's coming to grips with depression and mental illness that runs through the family, and writes extensively about Miles' breakdown."
I immediately went out on Sunday morning, bought the book, and read it that day (as well as fit in a visit to my parents).
At the start of the week, a simple web search located some details on Mile's mother's practice, and I sent her an email, explaining Miles and my background.
A couple of days later, I received an email from both Miles and his mother, while felt like a 'full circle'... years of wondering and waiting all resolved. I encouraged Miles to keep in touch if he wants, but after so many years and so much for both of us, who knows if we would still get along? But still, i'm leaving that ball in Mile's court, and i'm at least thankful for this book answering questions that have often returned to me over the years.
It does make you wonder though about those people who make an impact on you, who you lose touch with.
I've just had an sms from my friends hinted I should go out. It's 2.30am as I currently type this, and I tend to wonder about the hours my friends and I keep. Ant seems really keen, but I keep harping on the fact that i'm tired, and I don't really have any money, and we have a lot of birthdays and weddings coming up soon, not to mention the usual assortment of bills. While i'm certainly not old, I definitely envy those 20somethings who can go all night and just not feel it, but I find a big night out just knocks me for six nowadays. Ant has just brought me a glass of white wine, so I guess that says it all really. Either way, time for me to get off this thing and to get back into it.
Before I go, a big happy birthday to the beautiful, talented and inspired DJ Seb; many happy returns, and get your arse over here again soon.
I'm not going to go on about feeling guilty for not having done an update for a while. I guess when there isn't terribly much to write about, it would seem little point to actually sit down and write dribble. But that's where the catch is, cause really, that's all i'm doing now.
In all fairness, there have been rather a few note worthy events which have occured over the past month. I probably should've been a little more on the ball with covering them at the time, and so now it would feel a little nostalgic. And to be honest, I have just a hint of the flu at the moment, and so it is making me somewhat tired, vague, and feeling uncreative. But hey, time for some highlights (not my hair, although it may not be a bad idea).
Let's see... first revelation... I had Jimmy's birthday last weekend and was afraid of another weekend where I would go out and feel intensely crappy about the way I looked. I remembered in the past that whenever this happened, I found retail therapy to be the ultimate mood enhancer. I decided that, although I cannot afford it, I would go down this path again, and went out with Ant in search of a few new pieces of funky threads. And it worked! Although the night out itself proved to be somewhat eventful in a few other ways, I found that I was more my old self than what I have been of late. People talk about that period leading up to the 30's... is it Scorpion Rising, or some term like that... a watershed of past memories that makes us feel more intune with ourselves and more on track. I don't know... all I do know is that I tend to feel that the night of my 30th birthday celebrations was one of the best nights of my life, and that I don't think i've felt more in control and on track with my life before or after. But going out and getting those new items of clothing... it brought back a little bit more of the confident me as I was able to dress more as I felt I should be dressed and not in just finding anything that will fit. I guess the Queer Eye guys are onto something really... if you feel you look good, it is going to reflect to some degree on the inside.
After a big night out on the weekend, we did a recovery over at Michael Ritchie and Matt Coleman's place. And can I say, I don't think I could've asked for a better way to spend the day. The conversational was often rather philosophical, which we all know I tend to have a passion for, and I think it gave Michael and Matt more of an opportunity to discover Ant and realise why i'm as fascinated about this man. Lyle, Jimmy, and Dale also popped up during the day, which was fun.
Tom Parker is heading back to the UK this weekend. Although he is another one who I met via Kylie Minogue connections, i'm pleased that a real friendship seems to have been born out of it. We're working on that book together, but even aside from that, i'm pleased that during his time in Australia, i've been able to spend time with him and discover what a truly fascinating and fun man he is, and how much I am going to miss our afternoon chats about everything and nothing.
I've finally managed to get my first shipment of stock off to Esprit as well, which feels GREAT after the time it has taken to find the right boxes, pack the stock, label it all, find out about international shipping, getting someone to pick it up, etc... actually, it should all amount to not much time at all, but work has been so phenomenally busy lately that trying to find time to rest, be social, and everything inbetween seems rather consuming. I'm hoping to hear good feedback from Esprit, although I must admit that i'm feeling some what nervous about it and hope that they think the stock i've bought for them, and the prices i've paid, are all very fair and useable.
